His                                        February 25, 2015
i’ve had enough
of angry put-downs
and arrogant condemnations.
i am not a fool
to take you to heart.
you want a mirror
to smash when you
are tired of your reflection.
you keep trying to place me
on your high-horse
so i can take your fall
but my feet are firmly caked
in the humble clay
of my brokenness and burdens.
i can’t be your sacrifice
to knock off your pedestal
in your place.
i don’t want
to sit on your thrown of judgement.
if that is the price i won’t play.
i am not god
to sort the sheep from the goats.
who are you?
i am His,
and He calls me to follow
and waits when i stumble
and stagger in the mud.
He loves me no more than you
or the street drunk
or the ignorant literalist
or the dope fiend
or even the executioner.
maybe it is not fair
but it is just,
for we are all wanting.

that voice, His voice
    come daughter, follow me
    the mud does not matter
    on My floor.
it beckons me ever on, ever up
no matter my legs are still new
and i tumble and slip in my toddling.
like a drunk i tremble for that Love
and slur my words and speak visions.

i cannot reflect you
and glow with His light
nor can i climb your marble stairs
with His mud my only garment.
wet clay is heavy
and sucks deeper than quicksand.

wet clay is dense
with the nutrients of life.
from dust was i made and dust i will be.
dust breathing His spirit,
clay knit with His hands.

About m

My ego wants to think I'm a writer but my heart knows I'm just another one of God's Kids who sometimes has words to say. 2 human kids and 3 feline kids call me Mom. Or Mooooooom. Or mewom, depending which you ask. I'm kinda-sorta busy being a student again; this time I signed myself up for a bizarre torture known as Graduate School. Theoretically in 4ish years I'll have earned some more nice letters to put with my name. Let's face it, I'm addicted to learning and probably need rehab to restore me to sanity and remove the obsession to read books. I don't remember what free time is but I think I like to spend it sleeping or playing in the mud on a river bank.
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