i forgot

i forgot
i’m remembering all the times

we’ve fallen in love before

in this life,

in fragments of past lives

we have always been one
sitting on suburban side-walk curbs
and discussing astrology

somewhere by the ocean, i remember
foggy humid shores with rocks
and hills lush with grass

walking in the dark blur of
a fall evening already cold
and so absorbed in your
movement beside me i
forgot i was heading for
home and walked
needless blocks by your side

sending you to war or
adventure, staying home in
a dark, damp hut and holding
a small boy to my breast
who asks when daddy will
come back and i say i
don’t know but that
he will always

sitting on a store windowsill
with the grace of an August
rainbow’s hush on my turbulent
craving–i was still too young
to understand that god’s forgiveness
would come to mean nothing
to me–you are my eternity

i’m addicted to words and i have none for my most meaningful reality. i fight myself trying to explain, wishing i knew where to find the magic word to obtain release from my fears and annul my craving for a fix with the satisfaction of existing in the flux of being.

i want to feel you between my thighs moving slowly and delicately. the form of love making where i can sense the subtlety of your every heart beat. nothing but our two souls
and bodies as close as they can be, delighting in the perfection of mutual orgasm.

The funny thing is that the girl who wrote this used the three words that are magic and provide release from both fear and cravings – love, grace, and forgiveness.  And she was too young to understand that without God’s forgiveness she would never be more than a child sacrifice.

About m

My ego wants to think I'm a writer but my heart knows I'm just another one of God's Kids who sometimes has words to say. 2 human kids and 3 feline kids call me Mom. Or Mooooooom. Or mewom, depending which you ask. I'm kinda-sorta busy being a student again; this time I signed myself up for a bizarre torture known as Graduate School. Theoretically in 4ish years I'll have earned some more nice letters to put with my name. Let's face it, I'm addicted to learning and probably need rehab to restore me to sanity and remove the obsession to read books. I don't remember what free time is but I think I like to spend it sleeping or playing in the mud on a river bank.
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